It's almost the end of September... so where the eff are you?
I hate to throw a Veruca Salt style hissy fit but all this physio and back ache and general wooziness is not cool and frankly I think you owe it to me and every freezing cold Melbournian out there to shave off that beard and get out from under that mouldy rock you've been hibernating under. Give us some friggen ice-cream eating sunshiny weather why don't ya?
Also all this cloud is confusing the flowers and it's not like I've got time to go around putting gloves, parkas, and beanies on every Aquilegia, Anemone, Poppy, Daffodil etc in Melbourne.
Thanks to you I've been forced to post these stunning videos from Quay (a restaurant located in Melbourne's rival city Si Da Knee) b/c they remind me of when you (Spring) actually gave a shit about us Vitamin D deficient Melbournians and let the flowers bask in all your glory and bloom in peace.
So stop watching re-runs of 30 Rock and Flight of the Conchords (I'll take those DVDs thankyouverymuch), pick that spinach out of your teeth, and give us all a sunny high bloody five at the grand finals this weekend.
Because If you don't... I. WILL. CUT. YOU.
P.S. And when I say sunshine I mean a whole day of proper nice sunshine. Not 30 seconds of sunshine followed by 60 minute periods of depressing impending doom Melbournian cloudiness, freezing wind, and 'should I or shouldn't I put my umbrella up' mildly inconvenient spitting rain immediately followed by very inconvenient 'holy crap I knew I should've brought my umbrella' torrential rain.